Finally. It’s over.

The greatest part about this whole election cycle is that it is finally over.  I feel like I just finished watching two horse dwarfs mud wrestle for the last two years.  Geeze, it was horrendous.

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Never fear, McCain is here!

John McCain isn’t content to flail hopelessly. He now has to make a complete embarrassment of himself by knighting himself Savior of the Economy. He has decided to suspend his already dead campaign so he can run to Washington and save everyone from evil capitalists. Populists rejoice.
Here are 9 good reasons [...]

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Other outlandish but shockingly true conspiracies!

Completely plausible conspiracy #1.
There is a masochistic dental conspiracy.
It’s true! Dentists are indoctrinated from their earliest days of dental school on the proper mauling and torturing of poor folks who just want to get their cavities filled. How do I know this? Well, duh, all dentists hurt people, like, every day! [...]

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Election time!

Here’s what I propose: both candidates, one ring and a preference for sleeper holds. First one to say ‘uncle’ loses.
It would be less painful than having to watch John McCain and Barack Obama bash each other’s heads across the airwaves for the next few months. I loathe political TV ads. [...]

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